Faisal Ghaffar 
Overview
Neon White is a slick and unique speedrunning FPS that’s easy to understand but difficult to put down. It’s a brash blend of lightning-quick gameplay, fast and frantic battle, and a strange, card-based resource system. Consider the platforming sections of Doom Eternal, but consider replacing the grim hellscapes with the floating architectural style of an abstract heaven, and you’re halfway there. You’ll be even closer if you play Trials HD and try to ride the perfect path over the corpse of Mirror’s Edge. With its precise and stylish control system and its unnerving ability to make even the most inexperienced shooter player feel lithe and lethal, Neon White’s loop is extremely easy to fall into, even if the story that ties it all together quickly outstays its welcome.
On paper, Neon White’s oddball premise – sinners plucked from limbo to end up serving as parkour pest-exterminators, trying to clear out a demon infection in heaven as part of the annual competition where the winner will receive to stay – sounds intriguing. In practise, however, it turns Neon White into a young adult visual novel in which a bunch of brightly coloured, dead millennials reminisce about one‘s past lives and make the argument a lot. I appreciate developer Angel Matrix’s effort to slow down and add context to the 12 chapters and 97 levels he’s created here – rather than just machine-gunning them directly into our veins non-stop – but Neon White’s slightly over-assertive blend of music Christian faith and an off anime didn’t grab.
The God Squad
Outside of the otherwise flawless puzzle platforming, this results in a lot of chat to wade through, delivered by a production team of goths, gym bros, and fog capsule toys who are as annoying as they are horny. There’s the titular White, a straggly man who wears three belts, none of which appear to be connected to his trousers, and prefers to stand with his shoulders drawn back and his crotch thrust forward. Violet, a meat cleaver pixie with just an infantilised voice that could open a remote garage door, appears to be the type of woman who would dot the i’s on her ransom writings with love hearts. There’s also a stogie cat, a BDSM redhead inside a collar, and a meathead with spiky hair.
The Decision
Neon White is a fast-paced 1st action game regarding annihilating demons in Heaven in a nightmarishly clever story that demonstrates it’s never too late to ask forgiveness. Players take on the role of White, an assassin hand-picked from Hell to compete against other demon slayers for the chance to live forever in Heaven. Because True Believers are not allowed to kill, he and the other Neons are tasked with trying to deal with an evil demon infection. The Neons compete for the Mechanical Halo, a device that allows them to stay indefinitely, by using magical decks of cards that convert into weapons.
